








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 642 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 130 matches | ||
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,769 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5043 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3938 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2745 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3043 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $814,247 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 279 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ghost_solder556 | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | Firestar | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | d1t -iwnl- | 55% | 29 |
| #4 | FanaticDuck | 48% | 62 |
| #5 | Koh:) | 48% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | d1t -iwnl- | 55% | 29 |
| #4 | FanaticDuck | 48% | 62 |
| #5 | Koh:) | 48% | 75 |
| #6 | Gone | 47% | 19 |
| #7 | DRAINERMONKEY5000 | 46% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FanaticDuck | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | d1t -iwnl- | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FanaticDuck | 231 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Koh:) | 163 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | DRAINERMONKEY5000 | 124 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | ghost_solder556 | 98 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | d1t -iwnl- | 80 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gone | +2.10 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | d1t -iwnl- | +1.72 | 70 | 48 |
| #3 | ClutchLlama | +1.45 | 81 | 71 |
| #4 | DRAINERMONKEY5000 | +0.08 | 75 | 61 |
| #5 | Firestar | -0.00 | 75 | 66 |





