








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1500 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,760 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2008 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2021 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1540 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1191 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $556,672 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuikelo :_D | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | marok | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | recruit | 60% | 42 |
| #4 | Pulu | 55% | 38 |
| #5 | Kingrat | 53% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | 7 | 42% | 12 |
| #9 | vade | 42% | 12 |
| #10 | legit bile taneli | 42% | 12 |
| #11 | Je5u | 41% | 17 |
| #12 | Just Coala | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kingrat | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | recruit | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | marok | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Tuikelo :_D | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Harzza | 1 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kingrat | 407 | 0.33 | 12 min |
| #2 | recruit | 185 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #3 | Tuikelo :_D | 85 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | Pulu | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | 7 | 64 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 7 | +4.55 | 83 | 82 |
| #2 | Kingrat | +2.61 | 75 | 82 |
| #3 | recruit | +1.49 | 55 | 60 |
| #4 | Tuikelo :_D | +0.83 | 56 | 75 |
| #5 | legit bile taneli | +0.44 | 86 | 62 |





