








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 626 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Renown | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4881 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,740 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3429 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4497 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3503 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4311 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $863,100 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 267 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patshu | 64% | 39 |
| #2 | Schoeler | 63% | 391 |
| #3 | Sm1ley | 62% | 318 |
| #4 | Damcore | 58% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patshu | 64% | 39 |
| #2 | Schoeler | 63% | 391 |
| #3 | Sm1ley | 62% | 318 |
| #4 | Damcore | 58% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schoeler | 14 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Sm1ley | 13 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Damcore | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Patshu | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schoeler | 834 | 0.11 | 24 min |
| #2 | Sm1ley | 607 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #3 | Damcore | 83 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Patshu | 44 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sevice | +2.97 | 72 | 66 |
| #2 | Schoeler | +1.68 | 80 | 59 |
| #3 | Damcore | -1.11 | 69 | 71 |
| #4 | Sm1ley | -1.24 | 60 | 61 |
| #5 | Patshu | -3.91 | 31 | 46 |





