








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 297 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1314 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 435 | 18% |
| Smokes | 444 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 952 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 560 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $302,461 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pasha | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | Mister Chief | 44% | 122 |
| #3 | Gazor | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | Gmeiniix | 37% | 41 |
| #5 | 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓾𝔁 | 36% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓾𝔁 | 36% | 74 |
| #6 | Brätlihauer | 32% | 53 |
| #7 | SnipeTek | 31% | 26 |
| #8 | Fabreb | 30% | 23 |
| #9 | Paddingdong | 21% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gmeiniix | 4 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Mister Chief | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓾𝔁 | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Brätlihauer | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | SnipeTek | 2 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mister Chief | 286 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | Brätlihauer | 234 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | Fabreb | 152 | 0.34 | 4 min |
| #4 | 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓾𝔁 | 120 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Gmeiniix | 76 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnipeTek | +5.57 | 87 | 75 |
| #2 | Fabreb | +4.19 | 71 | 79 |
| #3 | Mister Chief | +1.56 | 64 | 73 |
| #4 | Pasha | +1.06 | 58 | 69 |
| #5 | lucachenchen | -0.07 | 46 | 48 |





