








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2903 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,399 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1506 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1391 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1824 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1678 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $760,124 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 58 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Calcifer4 | 68% | 72 |
| #2 | B O J J I | 63% | 46 |
| #3 | ✪Geos | 57% | 30 |
| #4 | Akroma | 51% | 194 |
| #5 | Calcifer3 | 45% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ✪Geos | 57% | 30 |
| #4 | Akroma | 51% | 194 |
| #5 | Calcifer3 | 45% | 42 |
| #6 | Kousei | 42% | 97 |
| #7 | Sak Mi Khok | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Akroma | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Kousei | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Calcifer4 | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | B O J J I | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Calcifer3 | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Akroma | 541 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | Kousei | 140 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Calcifer4 | 112 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | B O J J I | 105 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Calcifer3 | 57 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drimisril | +2.64 | 79 | 50 |
| #2 | Calcifer4 | +2.54 | 65 | 56 |
| #3 | B O J J I | +2.03 | 83 | 67 |
| #4 | Kousei | +1.60 | 67 | 53 |
| #5 | Calcifer3 | +1.53 | 64 | 53 |





