








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1562 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 283 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 193 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 109 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




78 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9194 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8614 | 27% |
| Smokes | 8292 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6145 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 8405 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,234,470 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 979 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zdooon | 64% | 73 |
| #2 | haren | 60% | 281 |
| #3 | Luda | 58% | 284 |
| #4 | Talentless | 58% | 481 |
| #5 | 5ushi | 56% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | haren | 60% | 281 |
| #3 | Luda | 58% | 284 |
| #4 | Talentless | 58% | 481 |
| #5 | 5ushi | 56% | 82 |
| #6 | m1nt | 48% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Talentless | 58 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | haren | 29 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Luda | 24 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | m1nt | 9 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | zdooon | 5 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Talentless | 2584 | 0.27 | 68 min |
| #2 | Luda | 720 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #3 | haren | 397 | 0.07 | 12 min |
| #4 | zdooon | 207 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | 5ushi | 179 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zdooon | +1.91 | 87 | 67 |
| #2 | mad3sto | +1.83 | 74 | 66 |
| #3 | haren | +1.81 | 53 | 53 |
| #4 | Talentless | +1.53 | 77 | 79 |
| #5 | 5ushi | +1.11 | 79 | 59 |





