








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1505 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 263 matches | ||
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




76 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7692 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,323 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12301 | 38% |
| Smokes | 8013 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5207 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 6802 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $875,370 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4991 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zdooon | 62% | 166 |
| #2 | Luda | 61% | 335 |
| #3 | 5ushi | 60% | 35 |
| #4 | haren | 60% | 139 |
| #5 | mad3sto | 58% | 481 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zdooon | 62% | 166 |
| #2 | Luda | 61% | 335 |
| #3 | 5ushi | 60% | 35 |
| #4 | haren | 60% | 139 |
| #5 | mad3sto | 58% | 481 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mad3sto | 53 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Luda | 28 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | haren | 14 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | zdooon | 10 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mad3sto | 1317 | 0.14 | 35 min |
| #2 | Luda | 851 | 0.13 | 24 min |
| #3 | zdooon | 520 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #4 | haren | 214 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | 5ushi | 75 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mad3sto | +2.23 | 73 | 67 |
| #2 | zdooon | +1.97 | 89 | 67 |
| #3 | Talentless | +1.95 | 78 | 79 |
| #4 | haren | +1.35 | 52 | 55 |
| #5 | Luda | +0.77 | 65 | 69 |





