










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1865 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,125 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2351 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2115 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1510 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1149 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $525,163 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ISBILPEEK | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | mathiaS | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | henril | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | Komisk stor støvel | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | ✪Hans0n | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Pysjamasmeister | 45% | 31 |
| #10 | Forbizon | 45% | 56 |
| #11 | Alfons Åberg | 40% | 47 |
| #12 | Bærrern | 40% | 62 |
| #13 | Woody | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bærrern | 7 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | Komisk stor støvel | 6 | 0.0090 |
| #3 | Nøkkelen | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Pysjamasmeister | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | ✪Hans0n | 2 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Komisk stor støvel | 171 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #2 | Bærrern | 157 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Alfons Åberg | 75 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Nøkkelen | 73 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | ISBILPEEK | 62 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ISBILPEEK | +4.99 | 68 | 68 |
| #2 | ✪Hans0n | +3.39 | 94 | 33 |
| #3 | Alfons Åberg | +2.74 | 95 | 47 |
| #4 | Komisk stor støvel | +2.56 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | Woody | +1.68 | 47 | 65 |





