








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 215 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2665 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1677 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2095 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1895 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1695 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $537,135 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iannello | 64% | 22 |
| #2 | Angelsquad | 50% | 30 |
| #3 | WiggyM8 | 48% | 50 |
| #4 | Wiger Woods | 46% | 216 |
| #5 | β
πΎππππππ | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Wiger Woods | 46% | 216 |
| #5 | β
πΎππππππ | 45% | 20 |
| #6 | Guts | 42% | 48 |
| #7 | LGTBQCentralCee | 41% | 17 |
| #8 | metal gear snake | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wiger Woods | 14 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | WiggyM8 | 9 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Guts | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Iannello | 6 | 0.0124 |
| #5 | Angelsquad | 4 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wiger Woods | 496 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | WiggyM8 | 194 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | β
πΎππππππ | 71 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | metal gear snake | 55 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | Guts | 43 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LGTBQCentralCee | +1.98 | 72 | 43 |
| #2 | Angelsquad | +1.33 | 71 | 56 |
| #3 | Guts | +0.94 | 47 | 41 |
| #4 | Tweqel | +0.60 | 59 | 46 |
| #5 | β
πΎππππππ | +0.07 | 80 | 53 |





