








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 186 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 686 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5791 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,865 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2016 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3372 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4574 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 2903 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,094,230 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 536 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Micheliche33 | 48% | 152 |
| #2 | DailyKaylee | 46% | 59 |
| #3 | Soup | 43% | 175 |
| #4 | munkles | 39% | 67 |
| #5 | Collins | 38% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Micheliche33 | 48% | 152 |
| #2 | DailyKaylee | 46% | 59 |
| #3 | Soup | 43% | 175 |
| #4 | munkles | 39% | 67 |
| #5 | Collins | 38% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Collins | 24 | 0.0154 |
| #2 | Micheliche33 | 23 | 0.0077 |
| #3 | Soup | 12 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | DailyKaylee | 9 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | munkles | 8 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Soup | 705 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #2 | Micheliche33 | 496 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #3 | munkles | 151 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | Collins | 147 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | DailyKaylee | 20 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Micheliche33 | +1.67 | 46 | 66 |
| #2 | DailyKaylee | +1.25 | 58 | 39 |
| #3 | munkles | +0.68 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | Soup | -0.63 | 35 | 57 |
| #5 | ethan | -1.03 | 33 | 43 |





