








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 167 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1104 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,728 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1019 | 27% |
| Smokes | 889 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 758 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1062 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $324,874 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 233 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | āÆšššš§ššš„āÆ | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | phil | 80% | 20 |
| #3 | TyMac | 76% | 45 |
| #4 | Devigne | 75% | 8 |
| #5 | D4v1eć | 70% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Execute | 62% | 13 |
| #9 | blackhawk | 62% | 26 |
| #10 | Charge | 58% | 24 |
| #11 | padZ | 53% | 40 |
| #12 | K1ngOfRandom | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rice | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Charge | 4 | 0.0082 |
| #3 | padZ | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | SweetDreams | 2 | 0.0168 |
| #5 | TyMac | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TyMac | 172 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #2 | Charge | 126 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #3 | padZ | 98 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | phil | 68 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | D4v1eć | 66 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Devigne | +3.89 | 91 | 74 |
| #2 | D4v1eć | +3.86 | 86 | 70 |
| #3 | SweetDreams | +1.88 | 92 | 57 |
| #4 | Smk3RR | +1.80 | 87 | 64 |
| #5 | Execute | +1.32 | 84 | 50 |





