








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 755 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 144 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3650 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,371 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3883 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2744 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2585 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2159 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,118,208 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1696 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NotChad | 63% | 38 |
| #2 | Perc Wazowski | 61% | 36 |
| #3 | Fruit-filler *the bull's eyes* | 57% | 44 |
| #4 | Durkmal | 52% | 166 |
| #5 | milk bather | 50% | 260 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zilla | +2.93 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | stuNz | +2.65 | 69 | 54 |
| #3 | NotChad | +2.45 | 83 | 59 |
| #4 | milk bather | +2.35 | 67 | 55 |
| #5 | Perc Wazowski | +1.54 | 57 | 58 |





