








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 810 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 370 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Esplay | 34 matches | 1,817 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5815 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5076 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4735 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4452 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,140,268 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LA Mellor | 61% | 64 |
| #2 | XantoZ | 50% | 323 |
| #3 | ♥48kg_H4wkeye♥ | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | ekk0 | 50% | 319 |
| #5 | Dog Days | 48% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ♥48kg_H4wkeye♥ | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | ekk0 | 50% | 319 |
| #5 | Dog Days | 48% | 42 |
| #6 | Caladolen ☆ | 44% | 48 |
| #7 | <viper>qlimax | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ekk0 | 11 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | XantoZ | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | LA Mellor | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Dog Days | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | ♥48kg_H4wkeye♥ | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ekk0 | 1255 | 0.18 | 33 min |
| #2 | XantoZ | 383 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #3 | Dog Days | 184 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | Caladolen ☆ | 67 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | ♥48kg_H4wkeye♥ | 49 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥48kg_H4wkeye♥ | +2.10 | 82 | 63 |
| #2 | Dog Days | +1.49 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | ekk0 | +0.87 | 69 | 74 |
| #4 | nnexi | +0.14 | 76 | 67 |
| #5 | <viper>qlimax | -0.13 | 72 | 46 |





