








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 754 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 76 matches | ||
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6375 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,911 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8393 | 32% |
| Smokes | 8179 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4875 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4464 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,656,776 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vinny Landlord | 20 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | Chartier | 16 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | LaYeiN | 10 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Totem ◢◤ | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | PizZA.The.Hutt | 10 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chartier | 986 | 0.13 | 26 min |
| #2 | PEBmeister | 783 | 0.11 | 24 min |
| #3 | PizZA.The.Hutt | 532 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #4 | Vinny Landlord | 454 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #5 | BokChuck | 416 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Totem ◢◤ | +3.36 | 75 | 62 |
| #2 | ə︎il∃ | +1.88 | 72 | 65 |
| #3 | Chartier | +1.45 | 69 | 61 |
| #4 | PEBmeister | +0.98 | 63 | 65 |
| #5 | Vinny Landlord | +0.79 | 82 | 57 |





