








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1203 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 190 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 149 matches | ||
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 243 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9044 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,565 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8775 | 33% |
| Smokes | 6344 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6030 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5416 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,065,359 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 834 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PizZA.The.Hutt | 22 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | ə︎il∃ | 19 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Vinny Landlord | 18 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | PEBmeister | 16 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Totem ◢◤ | 12 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Totem ◢◤ | +3.59 | 76 | 63 |
| #2 | Chartier | +2.07 | 72 | 62 |
| #3 | ə︎il∃ | +1.61 | 71 | 66 |
| #4 | PEBmeister | +0.95 | 62 | 64 |
| #5 | Vinny Landlord | +0.59 | 82 | 57 |





