








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 737 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8441 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,649 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6094 | 26% |
| Smokes | 7760 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3232 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 6563 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,799,336 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6982 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Egroski | 47 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | TheEdgeLord | 37 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | tuna sub | 27 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | Ooley18ttv | 19 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | N8 | 6 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheEdgeLord | 1523 | 0.16 | 40 min |
| #2 | Egroski | 1217 | 0.14 | 32 min |
| #3 | N8 | 782 | 0.32 | 19 min |
| #4 | Ooley18ttv | 235 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #5 | tuna sub | 76 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Camel Crusher | +1.93 | 70 | 46 |
| #2 | N8 | +0.93 | 72 | 68 |
| #3 | Egroski | +0.87 | 79 | 58 |
| #4 | TheEdgeLord | -0.99 | 44 | 65 |
| #5 | tuna sub | -1.31 | 45 | 40 |





