








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 267 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1216 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,425 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 865 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1316 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1448 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 796 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $598,560 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 148 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | farid karotte | 78% | 23 |
| #2 | RAF Klomora | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | 请教别人一次是五分钟 | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Menty | 56% | 32 |
| #5 | Daddelapparat2 | 56% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daddelapparat2 | 16 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | danny | 16 | 0.0092 |
| #3 | farid karotte | 14 | 0.0308 |
| #4 | gazy | 13 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | 请教别人一次是五分钟 | 11 | 0.0193 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gazy | 398 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #2 | Daddelapparat2 | 318 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | danny | 140 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | 请教别人一次是五分钟 | 110 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #5 | farid karotte | 79 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RAF Klomora | +4.24 | 57 | 57 |
| #2 | farid karotte | +2.56 | 67 | 58 |
| #3 | day 2 no zaza | +1.82 | 85 | 55 |
| #4 | wildpiggie | +1.74 | 84 | 48 |
| #5 | danny | +0.87 | 77 | 59 |





