








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 235 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2693 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,597 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1060 | 14% |
| Smokes | 2146 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2831 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1560 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $888,155 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Abandon Hope | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | nags | 54% | 123 |
| #3 | nags | 54% | 101 |
| #4 | purple | 54% | 59 |
| #5 | Pansku25 | 54% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | purple | 54% | 59 |
| #5 | Pansku25 | 54% | 198 |
| #6 | spunky | 51% | 214 |
| #7 | leska | 51% | 170 |
| #8 | Tsuppi | 47% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | leska | 11 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | spunky | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Pansku25 | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | nags | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | nags | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | leska | 659 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #2 | spunky | 658 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #3 | Pansku25 | 393 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | nags | 322 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #5 | nags | 265 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | purple | +4.18 | 69 | 68 |
| #2 | Abandon Hope | +3.36 | 70 | 61 |
| #3 | nags | +3.29 | 64 | 69 |
| #4 | nags | +3.16 | 67 | 69 |
| #5 | spunky | +1.02 | 78 | 63 |





