








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,903 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1377 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1544 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 690 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1292 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $529,565 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cOLE | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | +Hvnter | 81% | 16 |
| #3 | .iwnl.BindeR | 80% | 20 |
| #4 | Goose | 45% | 74 |
| #5 | Azzduh | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | .iwnl.BindeR | 80% | 20 |
| #4 | Goose | 45% | 74 |
| #5 | Azzduh | 43% | 14 |
| #6 | GirthQuake | 43% | 21 |
| #7 | GameyGamer258 | 39% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GameyGamer258 | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Goose | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | GirthQuake | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Azzduh | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | cOLE | 1 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GameyGamer258 | 177 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | Goose | 95 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | cOLE | 25 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | GirthQuake | 20 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | +Hvnter | 15 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cOLE | +4.71 | 76 | 80 |
| #2 | +Hvnter | +3.12 | 86 | 51 |
| #3 | .iwnl.BindeR | +1.33 | 64 | 46 |
| #4 | NiccB | +0.70 | 58 | 61 |
| #5 | GirthQuake | -0.26 | 37 | 59 |





