








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 203 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 107 matches | ||
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5237 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,234 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7398 | 49% |
| Smokes | 3720 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 749 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 3367 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $807,455 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 416 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tam | 73% | 33 |
| #2 | DopE | 65% | 40 |
| #3 | ʎnb ǝɔıu ɐ ɯ,ı {commend} | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | Cig | 56% | 39 |
| #5 | LiveNLetDie | 55% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cig | 17 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | LiveNLetDie | 13 | 0.0196 |
| #3 | Doc | 11 | 0.0168 |
| #4 | ʎnb ǝɔıu ɐ ɯ,ı {commend} | 5 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | MapleBar | 5 | 0.0094 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doc | +4.55 | 77 | 51 |
| #2 | ʎnb ǝɔıu ɐ ɯ,ı {commend} | +3.89 | 64 | 50 |
| #3 | MapleBar | +2.97 | 68 | 45 |
| #4 | Cig | +2.79 | 72 | 59 |
| #5 | kepper | +2.44 | 68 | 62 |





