








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1032 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 144 matches | ||
| Premier | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6235 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,905 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7233 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5401 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4014 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5257 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $655,938 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 753 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bwcdavid420 | 67% | 27 |
| #2 | KamenFD | 61% | 36 |
| #3 | Lilo | 52% | 298 |
| #4 | p1ksel | 50% | 30 |
| #5 | Havo | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Instii | 45% | 31 |
| #11 | D2Kester | 44% | 25 |
| #12 | pro quake player | 43% | 37 |
| #13 | REVY | 41% | 51 |
| #14 | Ogris | 34% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lilo | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | patches jr | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | pro quake player | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | ✪ Yøink -iwnl- | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Ogris | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lilo | 859 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #2 | KamenFD | 178 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #3 | Marc J | 176 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | bwcdavid420 | 145 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #5 | Ogris | 108 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cansky | +3.43 | 84 | 72 |
| #2 | pro quake player | +0.92 | 90 | 48 |
| #3 | KamenFD | +0.89 | 69 | 55 |
| #4 | p1ksel | +0.89 | 71 | 65 |
| #5 | Havo | +0.52 | 87 | 49 |





