








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 334 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
961 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1619 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1005 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 817 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1064 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $228,422 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eepis | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Rdy Nikke | 77% | 22 |
| #3 | Pete | 77% | 26 |
| #4 | $nipa | 68% | 19 |
| #5 | MakkaraMasa | 67% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Plantse | 65% | 77 |
| #9 | joncholi | 64% | 55 |
| #10 | 원카리 | 60% | 10 |
| #11 | Jallu | 56% | 16 |
| #12 | bLess | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plantse | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | joncholi | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plantse | 587 | 0.34 | 17 min |
| #2 | Nakkiorava | 244 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #3 | Rottis | 141 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | joncholi | 110 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | $nipa | 83 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nakkiorava | +4.52 | 75 | 76 |
| #2 | LQ- | +1.89 | 58 | 76 |
| #3 | bLess | +1.72 | 78 | 61 |
| #4 | Rdy Nikke | +1.29 | 56 | 49 |
| #5 | Plantse | +0.71 | 64 | 82 |





