








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 100 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1530 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 838 | 19% |
| Smokes | 741 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1152 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1581 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $572,750 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P4ter_g2uen_0 | 56% | 18 |
| #2 | PesTilEncE | 49% | 154 |
| #3 | PH4NT0M | 49% | 149 |
| #4 | The Grand_M | 48% | 143 |
| #5 | V1per | 47% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | PesTilEncE | 49% | 154 |
| #3 | PH4NT0M | 49% | 149 |
| #4 | The Grand_M | 48% | 143 |
| #5 | V1per | 47% | 110 |
| #6 | Farlaeus | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PH4NT0M | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | V1per | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | PesTilEncE | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | The Grand_M | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Farlaeus | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PesTilEncE | 714 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #2 | PH4NT0M | 458 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | The Grand_M | 221 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | V1per | 113 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Farlaeus | 46 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PH4NT0M | +2.46 | 89 | 65 |
| #2 | PesTilEncE | +0.10 | 74 | 80 |
| #3 | Alutard | -0.16 | 71 | 46 |
| #4 | V1per | -0.51 | 77 | 56 |
| #5 | The Grand_M | -0.60 | 63 | 60 |





