








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 869 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 394 matches | ||
| Wingman | 56 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,836 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8357 | 30% |
| Smokes | 7587 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5065 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 6827 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,255,552 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4_N1K | 58% | 36 |
| #2 | Farlaeus | 53% | 221 |
| #3 | P4ter_g2uen_0 | 52% | 86 |
| #4 | Alutard | 49% | 154 |
| #5 | The Grand_M | 49% | 390 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | P4ter_g2uen_0 | 52% | 86 |
| #4 | Alutard | 49% | 154 |
| #5 | The Grand_M | 49% | 390 |
| #6 | PH4NT0M | 49% | 448 |
| #7 | V1per | 49% | 341 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PH4NT0M | 16 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | V1per | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | The Grand_M | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Farlaeus | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Alutard | 6 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PH4NT0M | 1490 | 0.16 | 34 min |
| #2 | The Grand_M | 630 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #3 | V1per | 403 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #4 | Farlaeus | 260 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Alutard | 160 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PH4NT0M | +2.35 | 90 | 66 |
| #2 | PesTilEncE | +1.19 | 75 | 77 |
| #3 | V1per | -0.07 | 79 | 59 |
| #4 | Alutard | -0.20 | 70 | 48 |
| #5 | M4_N1K | -0.72 | 45 | 72 |





