








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1045 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,551 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 600 | 24% |
| Smokes | 451 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 782 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 718 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $190,403 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Proxi | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | V1RuS - Road to GN1 | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Hei (Jman) | 58% | 36 |
| #4 | ProfileUnknownTV | 56% | 64 |
| #5 | JBmasta | 52% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | V1RuS - Road to GN1 | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Hei (Jman) | 58% | 36 |
| #4 | ProfileUnknownTV | 56% | 64 |
| #5 | JBmasta | 52% | 87 |
| #6 | Clout | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProfileUnknownTV | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | JBmasta | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProfileUnknownTV | 225 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Hei (Jman) | 119 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | JBmasta | 115 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | V1RuS - Road to GN1 | 64 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #5 | Clout | 34 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Haovk | +2.29 | 80 | 51 |
| #2 | Hei (Jman) | +0.92 | 67 | 48 |
| #3 | V1RuS - Road to GN1 | +0.90 | 73 | 73 |
| #4 | ProfileUnknownTV | +0.42 | 84 | 68 |
| #5 | Proxi | +0.29 | 59 | 58 |





