








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 152 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,489 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 677 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1164 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1178 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1470 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $506,865 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | 57% | 35 |
| #2 | RCo | 57% | 58 |
| #3 | MaxPower | 56% | 52 |
| #4 | LayyJ | 54% | 95 |
| #5 | ◢◤ Naga | 52% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | 57% | 35 |
| #2 | RCo | 57% | 58 |
| #3 | MaxPower | 56% | 52 |
| #4 | LayyJ | 54% | 95 |
| #5 | ◢◤ Naga | 52% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◢◤ Naga | 14 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | LayyJ | 13 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | RCo | 7 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | MaxPower | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◢◤ Naga | 691 | 0.20 | 21 min |
| #2 | LayyJ | 232 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | RCo | 100 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | MaxPower | 41 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | 29 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◢◤ Naga | +1.32 | 77 | 73 |
| #2 | LayyJ | +1.29 | 76 | 58 |
| #3 | ▰︎ DRG ▰ | +0.20 | 66 | 62 |
| #4 | RCo | -0.79 | 51 | 68 |
| #5 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | -1.81 | 58 | 50 |





