








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2034 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2716 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2058 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3157 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2742 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $188,389 of utility $31 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MaxPower | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | ▰︎ DRG ▰ | 57% | 58 |
| #3 | ◢◤ Naga | 54% | 177 |
| #4 | LayyJ | 52% | 90 |
| #5 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | LayyJ | 52% | 90 |
| #5 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | 50% | 24 |
| #6 | JaP | 47% | 86 |
| #7 | Razgriz | 44% | 18 |
| #8 | Kyle | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◢◤ Naga | 17 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | LayyJ | 11 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | JaP | 8 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | ▰︎ DRG ▰ | 7 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Kyle | 2 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◢◤ Naga | 681 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #2 | LayyJ | 186 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Kyle | 41 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | ▰︎ DRG ▰ | 39 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | Razgriz | 34 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◢◤ Naga | +1.90 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | LayyJ | +1.63 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | ▰︎ DRG ▰ | +0.63 | 66 | 60 |
| #4 | RCo | +0.11 | 52 | 63 |
| #5 | ✪FestiveNigerian✪ | -1.73 | 55 | 44 |





