








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1464 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3202 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,504 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2793 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2492 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2600 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2619 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $775,796 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Laurence Fishburne | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | ..-Difigiano-.. | 53% | 15 |
| #3 | awes0mej0ke | 49% | 76 |
| #4 | PHS | 47% | 51 |
| #5 | sebian | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D4RKC3DM4N | 182 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | n00byd00byd00 | 155 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | awes0mej0ke | 145 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | PHS | 71 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | yOu rEal Fr | 65 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Utz | +2.92 | 80 | 68 |
| #2 | PHS | +2.67 | 89 | 44 |
| #3 | awes0mej0ke | +0.89 | 78 | 55 |
| #4 | n00byd00byd00 | +0.63 | 74 | 70 |
| #5 | Vayux ツ | +0.48 | 64 | 60 |





