








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 510 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2846 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,183 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 907 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1803 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1798 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1675 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,007,089 of utility $198 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 302 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | julmEzhA=DDD! | 63% | 142 |
| #2 | wiiiii | 61% | 36 |
| #3 | Stone | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | teb | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | julmEzhA=DDD! | 63% | 142 |
| #2 | wiiiii | 61% | 36 |
| #3 | Stone | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | teb | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | julmEzhA=DDD! | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | wiiiii | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | teb | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | julmEzhA=DDD! | 777 | 0.25 | 21 min |
| #2 | wiiiii | 154 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #3 | teb | 49 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Stone | 42 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wiiiii | +2.01 | 82 | 72 |
| #2 | kiiPulaTeAm | +2.01 | 89 | 54 |
| #3 | julmEzhA=DDD! | +1.23 | 81 | 74 |
| #4 | teb | -0.66 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | Stone | -3.15 | 45 | 66 |





