








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 190 matches | ||
| Faceit | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,986 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2314 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2174 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2498 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2000 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,107,044 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛RiiPzZ | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Ich bin Noah | 59% | 70 |
| #3 | Patrie2eZ | 56% | 62 |
| #4 | Tony Ravioli | 54% | 80 |
| #5 | A Silly Raccoon | 51% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patrie2eZ | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Tony Ravioli | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Ich bin Noah | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | A Silly Raccoon | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | ✪Vestr0 | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Vestr0 | 388 | 0.28 | 11 min |
| #2 | Patrie2eZ | 222 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | Ich bin Noah | 157 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | A Silly Raccoon | 113 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Tony Ravioli | 110 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | La Flama Blanca | +1.46 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | ♛RiiPzZ | +1.06 | 69 | 67 |
| #3 | Perplex | +0.41 | 59 | 59 |
| #4 | Tony Ravioli | +0.18 | 76 | 54 |
| #5 | Ich bin Noah | +0.02 | 61 | 69 |





