








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
242 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,781 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 284 | 16% |
| Smokes | 415 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 636 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 446 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $84,785 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mind cntrl | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | stN* | 86% | 7 |
| #3 | SykZz | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | Moquai | 69% | 13 |
| #5 | Hj0zzi⭕⃤ | 67% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | MyFriend | 45% | 11 |
| #12 | geirii-.- | 33% | 3 |
| #13 | wrestliii beljubrókari | 33% | 3 |
| #14 | REN | 25% | 4 |
| #15 | Blóm | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 😄 | 2 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | Iceman | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Moquai | 1 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | mind cntrl | 1 | 0.0167 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Iceman | 46 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | MyFriend | 46 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | 'SýningarmaðuriNN | 35 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | Blóm | 28 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Moquai | 26 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mind cntrl | +7.51 | 88 | 67 |
| #2 | Iceman | +2.67 | 75 | 69 |
| #3 | wrestliii beljubrókari | +2.37 | 79 | 68 |
| #4 | Moquai | +2.12 | 72 | 68 |
| #5 | 'SýningarmaðuriNN | +1.73 | 41 | 79 |





