








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 596 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 172 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




83 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5808 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,857 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5514 | 35% |
| Smokes | 3195 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3485 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3663 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $952,195 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1928 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pattar | 679 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #2 | CumGuzzler35 | 643 | 0.20 | 14 min |
| #3 | 我讨厌以色列✞ | 625 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #4 | XANDER- | 510 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #5 | AsianAssist | 193 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boop | +1.38 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | 我讨厌以色列✞ | +1.19 | 90 | 57 |
| #3 | XANDER- | +1.14 | 68 | 69 |
| #4 | CumGuzzler35 | +0.69 | 75 | 63 |
| #5 | AsianAssist | +0.36 | 77 | 64 |





