








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 258 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8757 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,340 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4129 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4346 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 2130 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 735 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,268,580 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Park | 57% | 345 |
| #7 | Miss Panda 0o0 | 50% | 54 |
| #8 | Lilli Bendriss | 45% | 33 |
| #9 | Devlish | 43% | 69 |
| #10 | r0dh3773 | 41% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Park | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Snusken | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Devlish | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Lilli Bendriss | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Widerøe Flyveselskap AS | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Park | 703 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | Snusken | 231 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Devlish | 130 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Widerøe Flyveselskap AS | 58 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | r0dh3773 | 37 | 0.05 | 1 min |





