








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 848 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 324 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 182 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,349 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4220 | 20% |
| Smokes | 7876 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3835 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5418 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $895,117 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 238 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrWolf | 9 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Ruth krutt | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Lilli Bendriss | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | r0dh3773 | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Devlish | 7 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Park | 392 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | Ruth krutt | 274 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | MrWolf | 226 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | Devlish | 157 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | r0dh3773 | 128 | 0.04 | 3 min |





