








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
261 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,080 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 209 | 19% |
| Smokes | 161 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 561 | 52% |
| Molotovs | 149 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $150,122 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BBQ Doritos | 50% | 4 |
| #2 | Cool Ranch Doritos | 41% | 22 |
| #3 | Taco Doritos | 38% | 8 |
| #4 | Flaming Hot Doritos | 35% | 20 |
| #5 | Salsa Verde Doritos | 33% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Cool Ranch Doritos | 41% | 22 |
| #3 | Taco Doritos | 38% | 8 |
| #4 | Flaming Hot Doritos | 35% | 20 |
| #5 | Salsa Verde Doritos | 33% | 24 |
| #6 | Atomic Chile Doritos | 28% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atomic Chile Doritos | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Cool Ranch Doritos | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Salsa Verde Doritos | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atomic Chile Doritos | 30 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #2 | Cool Ranch Doritos | 30 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Salsa Verde Doritos | 22 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Flaming Hot Doritos | 15 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | Taco Doritos | 7 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cool Ranch Doritos | +6.38 | 66 | 67 |
| #2 | Atomic Chile Doritos | +0.95 | 56 | 45 |
| #3 | Taco Doritos | -0.02 | 54 | 24 |
| #4 | BBQ Doritos | -2.27 | 55 | 15 |
| #5 | Salsa Verde Doritos | -2.78 | 43 | 60 |





