








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1689 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,683 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 136 | 5% |
| Smokes | 993 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 935 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 619 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,172,162 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 182 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cool Ranch Doritos | 53% | 49 |
| #2 | Atomic Chile Doritos | 46% | 56 |
| #3 | Salsa Verde Doritos | 45% | 55 |
| #4 | Wikid | 41% | 76 |
| #5 | Nacho Cheese Doritos | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cool Ranch Doritos | +5.88 | 64 | 69 |
| #2 | Wikid | +3.71 | 70 | 43 |
| #3 | Atomic Chile Doritos | +3.44 | 63 | 41 |
| #4 | Coconut Water | +3.09 | 63 | 26 |
| #5 | Sour Bones | +1.36 | 63 | 62 |





