








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 672 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 406 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4320 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,148 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3162 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3979 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3654 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3353 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,345,118 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 610 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigRich | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | screM | 53% | 149 |
| #3 | ♿ | 51% | 55 |
| #4 | llllllllluke | 51% | 290 |
| #5 | Flag Man | 48% | 221 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | screM | 53% | 149 |
| #3 | ♿ | 51% | 55 |
| #4 | llllllllluke | 51% | 290 |
| #5 | Flag Man | 48% | 221 |
| #6 | The Kyle Smith | 47% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | llllllllluke | 23 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Flag Man | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | ♿ | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | screM | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | llllllllluke | 414 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #2 | screM | 277 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | Flag Man | 227 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | ♿ | 78 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | The Kyle Smith | 65 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | llllllllluke | +1.30 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | GR✪MACHIN✪ | +1.12 | 56 | 66 |
| #3 | ♿ | +0.80 | 72 | 61 |
| #4 | Flag Man | -0.21 | 72 | 61 |
| #5 | screM | -0.89 | 69 | 56 |





