








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1021 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,930 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1096 | 18% |
| Smokes | 642 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 2630 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 1562 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $557,973 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 237 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Rababarnes Landsbank | 35% | 71 |
| #10 | Ost Stänger | 34% | 83 |
| #11 | oXn^ | 33% | 27 |
| #12 | Potatis stänger | 32% | 69 |
| #13 | Chrilsk | 21% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ost Stänger | 433 | 0.26 | 13 min |
| #2 | Potatis stänger | 363 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #3 | Rababarnes Landsbank | 330 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #4 | H4NKZ | 158 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | oXn^ | 115 | 0.21 | 3 min |





