








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1205 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,406 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1197 | 27% |
| Smokes | 968 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1196 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1045 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $318,823 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frumsze | 53% | 47 |
| #2 | DYNA | 52% | 111 |
| #3 | MiauZedong | 52% | 125 |
| #4 | filous | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | Simpli | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Simpli | 50% | 16 |
| #6 | Pfnatsch | 47% | 19 |
| #7 | superphum | 44% | 57 |
| #8 | leftclicklenny | 43% | 14 |
| #9 | h҉e҉l҉l҉SpawN | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DYNA | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | MiauZedong | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Pfnatsch | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | frumsze | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Simpli | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiauZedong | 305 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | DYNA | 139 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | frumsze | 71 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | superphum | 62 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Pfnatsch | 31 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frumsze | +3.75 | 94 | 50 |
| #2 | filous | +1.94 | 78 | 63 |
| #3 | h҉e҉l҉l҉SpawN | +1.93 | 98 | 47 |
| #4 | leftclicklenny | +1.92 | 67 | 70 |
| #5 | DYNA | +0.95 | 87 | 48 |





