








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 193 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 195 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4316 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,007 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4497 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2964 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2530 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3016 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $990,191 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 402 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mscv | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | uɐlʎp | 64% | 89 |
| #3 | Moon Knight | 58% | 113 |
| #4 | Bkasz | 57% | 44 |
| #5 | Warry3k | 57% | 207 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fancy P | 11 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | clasher | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ap | 9 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | Warry3k | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Moon Knight | 5 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clasher | 803 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #2 | Warry3k | 506 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #3 | Fancy P | 481 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #4 | uɐlʎp | 259 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Moon Knight | 178 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ne0 | +3.60 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | mscv | +1.51 | 88 | 40 |
| #3 | uɐlʎp | +1.40 | 82 | 58 |
| #4 | clasher | +1.23 | 82 | 62 |
| #5 | ap | +0.91 | 70 | 51 |





