








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 342 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 155 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1987 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,733 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2247 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2496 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2159 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1831 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $530,625 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0sy- | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | ScumbagSpruck | 55% | 77 |
| #3 | buster | 52% | 136 |
| #4 | F4XENBERG | 52% | 73 |
| #5 | N0KA | 50% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ScumbagSpruck | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | F4XENBERG | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | buster | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | plex | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | J@NNICk | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ScumbagSpruck | 204 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | plex | 183 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | F4XENBERG | 179 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | buster | 161 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | J@NNICk | 153 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F4XENBERG | +2.82 | 86 | 75 |
| #2 | LeftTap | +1.98 | 77 | 71 |
| #3 | N0KA | +1.77 | 81 | 79 |
| #4 | Puniii | +1.57 | 76 | 80 |
| #5 | TrixY | +0.98 | 91 | 71 |





