








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 159 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
994 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,318 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 772 | 23% |
| Smokes | 808 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 857 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 881 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $376,109 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wotah. | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | chiri | 77% | 13 |
| #3 | Laesche | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | ady | 70% | 10 |
| #5 | MK | 67% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crousi | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | ♥ IMNASA ♥ | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | _4LIEN #awpabuser | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | ady | 1 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | Levi Blyat | 1 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wotah. | +3.14 | 72 | 77 |
| #2 | chiri | +1.98 | 55 | 64 |
| #3 | Hypnoxas | +1.87 | 65 | 74 |
| #4 | _4LIEN #awpabuser | +1.39 | 72 | 58 |
| #5 | Laesche | +1.28 | 85 | 46 |





