








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 270 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1989 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,869 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 485 | 10% |
| Smokes | 1047 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2252 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 1085 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $919,966 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Stonii | 42% | 24 |
| #13 | wikket ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 39% | 18 |
| #14 | burnz0 | 33% | 15 |
| #15 | selz | 30% | 20 |
| #16 | Whity | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ClitCommander | 87 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | DirRrrTy_ | 82 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | spt_the_lucker | 54 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | -1h | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sykaron | 50 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | burnz0 | +4.07 | 79 | 62 |
| #2 | crz | +3.39 | 54 | 73 |
| #3 | spt_the_server | +2.14 | 27 | 65 |
| #4 | -1h | +1.99 | 85 | 65 |
| #5 | yoshi_deLuxe | +1.05 | 45 | 53 |





