








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1093 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,802 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2326 | 40% |
| Smokes | 1291 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 991 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1194 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $158,057 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FakeSteez | 72% | 46 |
| #2 | Suna | 70% | 23 |
| #3 | tripp | 68% | 69 |
| #4 | Warhawk | 67% | 79 |
| #5 | Qwerty | 63% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | tripp | 68% | 69 |
| #4 | Warhawk | 67% | 79 |
| #5 | Qwerty | 63% | 93 |
| #6 | Roblox gunslinger | 54% | 13 |
| #7 | Tart | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Warhawk | 6 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | tripp | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Qwerty | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Suna | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Tart | 1 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qwerty | 417 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #2 | Warhawk | 279 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #3 | tripp | 213 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | FakeSteez | 87 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Roblox gunslinger | 51 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tripp | +3.09 | 88 | 67 |
| #2 | JJCH!N | +1.45 | 68 | 80 |
| #3 | Tart | +0.74 | 66 | 48 |
| #4 | Warhawk | +0.69 | 59 | 70 |
| #5 | Qwerty | +0.30 | 71 | 65 |





