








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 341 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4627 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,171 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2074 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3021 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5203 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 2873 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,701,046 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 167 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srircha | 51% | 209 |
| #2 | DogDick69420 | 51% | 334 |
| #3 | ChanMan | 50% | 371 |
| #4 | One Wing | 50% | 321 |
| #5 | Teed0 | 48% | 152 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srircha | 51% | 209 |
| #2 | DogDick69420 | 51% | 334 |
| #3 | ChanMan | 50% | 371 |
| #4 | One Wing | 50% | 321 |
| #5 | Teed0 | 48% | 152 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srircha | 38 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | DogDick69420 | 29 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | ChanMan | 13 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | One Wing | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Teed0 | 6 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DogDick69420 | 1977 | 0.28 | 62 min |
| #2 | srircha | 845 | 0.19 | 24 min |
| #3 | One Wing | 826 | 0.12 | 25 min |
| #4 | ChanMan | 556 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #5 | Teed0 | 266 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | srircha | +2.29 | 67 | 66 |
| #2 | PARKiE | +2.18 | 74 | 59 |
| #3 | DogDick69420 | -0.44 | 48 | 74 |
| #4 | One Wing | -0.89 | 59 | 69 |
| #5 | ChanMan | -1.00 | 51 | 56 |





