








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1434 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,292 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 760 | 23% |
| Smokes | 816 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 985 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 731 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $245,946 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | andyke | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Joschko ♥ S | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | jakubvx0 | 59% | 68 |
| #4 | SimoleS | 58% | 12 |
| #5 | M4t0d4B | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ mms | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | imdcandy | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | jakubvx0 | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Dont Worry ૐ | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | M4t0d4B | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ mms | 102 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | SaltyPatty | 86 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | jakubvx0 | 81 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Joschko ♥ S | 77 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dont Worry ૐ | 64 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Riso | +3.38 | 95 | 63 |
| #2 | Dont Worry ૐ | +2.67 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | jakubvx0 | +2.47 | 84 | 60 |
| #4 | M4t0d4B | +0.99 | 78 | 51 |
| #5 | Joschko ♥ S | +0.99 | 56 | 71 |





