








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 294 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 469 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3844 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,238 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8339 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6520 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 7145 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5234 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,031,352 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JT | 50% | 385 |
| #2 | ChimpanWeen | 50% | 236 |
| #3 | SKXFIJI | 49% | 550 |
| #4 | Zenxter | 47% | 139 |
| #5 | Bevin | 45% | 163 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKXFIJI | 35 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | ChimpanWeen | 33 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | JT | 27 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Zenxter | 11 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Bevin | 5 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKXFIJI | 1716 | 0.15 | 38 min |
| #2 | JT | 754 | 0.09 | 19 min |
| #3 | Zenxter | 495 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #4 | ChimpanWeen | 251 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | Bevin | 114 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKXFIJI | +1.25 | 58 | 69 |
| #2 | JT | +0.93 | 52 | 61 |
| #3 | ChimpanWeen | +0.42 | 66 | 36 |
| #4 | Zenxter | +0.14 | 38 | 55 |
| #5 | Bevin | -0.99 | 36 | 45 |





