








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 664 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Renown | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4362 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,390 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4679 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5108 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4075 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3528 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,118,697 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 388 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Barra- | 30 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | HiTempo | 14 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Føx | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | L𝔬n𝔢✞S𝔲rv𝔦v𝔬r | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Le-Bartender | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Barra- | 897 | 0.21 | 24 min |
| #2 | HiTempo | 581 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #3 | L𝔬n𝔢✞S𝔲rv𝔦v𝔬r | 263 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | TJ | 150 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Føx | 129 | 0.07 | 3 min |





