








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 896 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 275 matches | ||
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 83 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4149 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,161 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1958 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2445 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3484 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3274 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,833,366 of utility $207 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2827 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daveez | 57% | 68 |
| #2 | lennart | 56% | 97 |
| #3 | stratmeistr | 54% | 61 |
| #4 | Raiix | 53% | 49 |
| #5 | OneTweeezy | 51% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | OneTweeezy | 51% | 43 |
| #6 | Ente Quakus | 50% | 234 |
| #7 | Jan Hellinger | 45% | 22 |
| #8 | Bauer Gurke | 41% | 49 |
| #9 | Botopie | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ente Quakus | 13 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | daveez | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | stratmeistr | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | lennart | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Raiix | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ente Quakus | 875 | 0.18 | 22 min |
| #2 | lennart | 219 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | daveez | 128 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | OneTweeezy | 92 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Raiix | 62 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lennart | +1.41 | 64 | 69 |
| #2 | daveez | +1.34 | 77 | 57 |
| #3 | Ente Quakus | +1.05 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | Тимбасско | +0.46 | 71 | 49 |
| #5 | Raiix | -0.25 | 68 | 64 |





