








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 302 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2033 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,945 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1402 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1997 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1812 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1734 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,326,161 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 267 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | b0nKfap | 42% | 36 |
| #9 | beans | 41% | 122 |
| #10 | Munch ツ | 40% | 40 |
| #11 | Zeeerup | 37% | 30 |
| #12 | wenomechainsama | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tkmoney | 21 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Zeeerup | 7 | 0.0108 |
| #3 | beans | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Big Z | 4 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | wenomechainsama | 3 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tkmoney | 302 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #2 | beans | 177 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Zeeerup | 169 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #4 | sp00ky | 141 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | ziggy | 138 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Munch ツ | +4.85 | 82 | 58 |
| #2 | ziggy | +4.09 | 54 | 68 |
| #3 | Zeeerup | +3.85 | 50 | 51 |
| #4 | Big Z | +2.63 | 50 | 59 |
| #5 | b0nKfap | +1.10 | 77 | 57 |





